the kite runner-第138部分

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ll　been　waiting　for　you。　
Looking　at　her　smiling　at　Sohrab；　her　eyes　tearing　over　a　little；　I　had　a　glimpse　of　the　mother　she　might　have　been；　had　her　own　womb　not　betrayed　her。
Sohrab　shifted　on　his　feet　and　looked　away。
SORAYA　HAD　TURNED　THE　STUDY　upstairs　into　a　bedroom　for　Sohrab。　She　led　him　in　and　he　sat　on　the　edge　of　the　bed。　The　sheets　showed　brightly　colored　kites　flying　in　indigo　blue　skies。　She　had　made　inscriptions　on　the　wall　by　the　closet；　feet　and　inches　to　measure　a　child　s　growing　height。　At　the　foot　of　the　bed；　I　saw　a　wicker　basket　stuffed　with　books；　a　lootive；　a　water　color　set。
Sohrab　was　wearing　the　plain　white　T…shirt　and　new　denims　I　had　bought　him　in　Islamabad　just　before　we　d　left……the　shirt　hung　loosely　over　his　bony；　slumping　shoulders。　The　color　still　hadn　t　seeped　back　into　his　face；　save　for　the　halo　of　dark　circles　around　his　eyes。　He　was　looking　at　us　now　in　the　impassive　way　he　looked　at　the　plates　of　boiled　rice　the　hospital　orderly　placed　before　him。
Soraya　asked　if　he　liked　his　room　and　I　noticed　that　she　was　trying　to　avoid　looking　at　his　wrists　and　that　her　eyes　kept　swaying　back　to　those　jagged　pink　lines。　Sohrab　lowered　his　head。　Hid　his　hands　under　his　thighs　and　said　nothing。
Then　he　simply　lay　his　head　on　the　pillow。　Less　than　five　minutes　later；　Soraya　and　I　watching　from　the　doorway；　he　was　snoring。
We　went　to　bed；　and　Soraya　fell　asleep　with　her　head　on　my　chest。　In　the　darkness　of　our　room；　I　lay　awake；　an　insomniac　once　more。　Awake。　And　alone　with　demons　of　my　own。　Sometime　in　the　middle　of　the　night；　I　slid　out　of　bed　and　went　to　Sohrab　s　room。　I　stood　over　him；　looking　down；　and　saw　some　thing　protruding　from　under　his　pillow。　I　picked　it　up。　Saw　it　was　Rahim　Khan　s　Polaroid；　the　one　I　had　given　to　Sohrab　the　night　we　had　sat　by　the　Shah　Faisal　Mosque。　The　one　of　Hassan　and　Sohrab　standing　side　by　side；　squinting　in　the　light　of　the　sun；　and　smiling　like　the　world　was　a　good　and　just　place。　I　wondered　how　long　Sohrab　had　lain　in　bed　staring　at　the　photo；　turning　it　in　his　hands。
I　looked　at　the　photo。　Your　father　was　a　man　torn　between　two　halves；　Rahim　Khan　had　said　in　his　letter。　I　had　been　the　entitled　half；　the　society…approved；　legitimate　half；　the　unwitting　embodiment　of　Baba　s　guilt。　I　looked　at　Hassan；　showing　those　two　missing　front　teeth；　sunlight　slanting　on　his　face。　Baba　s　other　half。　The　unentitled；　unprivileged　half。　The　half　who　had　inherited　what　had　been　pure　and　noble　in　Baba。　The　half　that；　maybe；　in　the　most　secret　recesses　of　his　heart；　Baba　had　thought　of　as　his　true　son。
I　slipped　the　picture　back　where　I　had　found　it。　Then　I　realized　something：　That　last　thought　had　brought　no　sting　with　it。　Closing　Sohrab　s　door；　I　wondered　if　that　was　how　forgiveness　budded；　not　with　the　fanfare　of　epiphany；　but　with　pain　gathering　its　things；　packing　up；　and　slipping　away　unannounced　in　the　middle　of　the　night。
THE　GENERAL　AND　KHALA　JAMILA　came　over　for　dinner　the　following　night。　Khala　Jamila；　her　hair　cut　short　and　a　darker　shade　of　red　than　usual；　handed　Soraya　the　plate　of　almondtopped　maghout　she　had　brought　for　dessert。　She　saw　Sohrab　and　beamed。　　_Mashallah_！　Soraya　jan　told　us　how　khoshteep　you　were；　but　you　are　even　more　handsome　in　person；　Sohrab　jan。　　She　handed　him　a　blue　turtleneck　sweater。　　I　knitted　this　for　you；　　she　said。　　For　next　winter。　_Inshallah_；　it　will　fit　you。　
Sohrab　took　the　sweater　from　her。
　Hello；　young　man；　　was　all　the　general　said；　leaning　with　both　hands　on　his　cane；　looking　at　Sohrab　the　way　one　might　study　a　bizarre　decorative　item　at　someone　s　house。
I　answered；　and　answered　again；　Khala　Jamila　s　questions　about　my　injuries……I　d　asked　Soraya　to　tell　them　I　had　been　mugged……reassuring　her　that　I　had　no　permanent　damage；　that　the　wires　would　e　out　in　a　few　weeks　so　I　d　be　able　to　eat　her　cooking　again；　that；　yes；　I　would　try　rubbing　rhubarb　juice　and　sugar　on　my　scars　to　make　them　fade　faster。
The　general　and　I　sat　in　the　living　room　and　sipped　wine　while　Soraya　and　her　mother　set　the　table。　I　told　him　about　Kabul　and　the　Taliban。　He　listened　and　nodded；　his